AHEM
Hello There!
ASM Presents
Another All Premieres Extravaganza
Thursday 19 June 2008 at 8 pm
at
The Pig And Whistle
165 West 47th Street
(BDFV to Rockefeller Center, NRW to 49th St, 1CE to 50th)
As always, a steal at $9.99.
FEATURING THE ABSOLUTE AND POSITIVE WORLD PREMIERES OF:
Eric Shanfield: The Admonitory Hippopotamus
John Wriggle: Sectional 2: "I Wish I Had a Reason to Wear My Power Suit"
David Durst - "correction"
Peter Hess: "Voiceprint XII for Mallets"
Pat Muchmore - H-bar
Andrea La Rose: "Novice Trip"
Barry Seroff: Duo #3
AND THE EXTRAORDINARY TALENTS OF
Hubert Chen, Peter Hess, Bradley Kemp, Andrea La Rose, Pat Muchmore, Franz Nicolay, Dan Neustadt, Kamala Sankaram, Barry Seroff, Ken Thomson, Pete Wise, John Wriggle
FOR MORE INFORMATION
http://www.myspace.com/antisocialmusic
AN EXPOSITORY ESSAY ON THE TITLE AND LOCATION OF THE SHOW
when pigs whistle.
An old adage states, "Never teach a pig to sing: it wastes your time and annoys the pig." However, the members of Anti-Social Music are highly trainable. Here's how it works:
Potbellied ASM is extremely intelligent and eager to learn. These characteristics make it easy to train. Additionally, it is very beer-motivated; so it will do almost anything for beer. If you have a good bond with ASM and practice a little patience, ASM can be trained in no time. Read on to learn more.
Instructions
Difficulty: Moderately Easy
Things You'll Need:
Beer (and an ear for new music)
Teach ASM Tricks
Step 1: Create a bond with ASM. It's impossible to teach ASM to do anything if it doesn't trust you. Let ASM get comfortable with you and the environment by attending one of its shows.
Step 2: Decide what you want to train your potbellied ASM to do. ASM can do a number of tricks from sitting to shaking hands to blowing a horn. You can also teach your ASM practical things like being gentle or going to the bathroom on command. It can also be trained to perform music by Pat Muchmore, Barry Serroff, Peter Hess, Andrea La Rose, John Wriggle, and David Durst, possibly others.
Step 3: Pick a time to train ASM, preferably when ASM is alert and interested in you, i.e., at one of its shows. It's no use to force ASM to train if it doesn't want to. ASM is stubborn and will resist any attempt you make to bend their will.
Step 4: Use commands to train ASM. Use 1 or 2 words for each command and make them distinct from one another and so ASM can differentiate between them. ASM can learn hundreds of words.
Step 5: Treat ASM each time it obeys at first and then only when it obeys a series of commands. Eventually, you want ASM to obey without getting a treat (read = beer), just for praise and affection.
Step 6: Limit the size of the treats you use. Cheerios and grapes are bad for training because they are small, low in fat and ASM hates them.
Step 7: Keep training sessions short. 1 to 1.5 hour shows are recommended. Stop when ASM starts to show signs of boredom or doesn't get it because you don't want ASM to fail and get frustrated.
Other tips:
Use a high tone of voice for praise. Let touching be a reward so you don't have to treat all the time to get your potbellied ASM to obey.
Don't reprimand ASM with physical violence like hitting. ASM will not respond favorably to this and it will damage your bond.
Don't give ASM treats from overhead. This will make it have to jump for or snap at your hand and can lead to an aggressive behavior. Instead, treat from the floor or its level and teach it the word "gentle" to take a treat from your hand.
Past Performances:
- ASM Presents Double Trouble: A Night of Duos April 13, 2024
- ASM Presents La Suspendida March 12, 2024
- ASM Presents A Night Of Math Improv-ish December 13, 2023
- ASM Presents Invocation XII December 8, 2023
- ASM Presents Ghost Ensemble November 9, 2023
- ASM Presents Elliott Sharp: Occam's Machete October 12, 2023
- ASM and Eli Wallace Present October 6, 2023
- ASM, Opera On Tap, Kinesis Project dance theatre, and Shahrokh Yadegari present: Capacity, or: the Work of Crackling September 30 / October 1, 2023
- ASM Presents The Sway Machinery's The Dream Past: A Sonic Conjuring September 21, 2023
- ASM Presents The Why at Mama Tried September 13, 2023
- ASM Presents A Dying Person June 12, 2023
- ASM Presents Infrequent Seams June 7, 8, and 10, 2023
- ASM Presents Infrequent Seams Festival December 19, 2022
- ASM, Opera On Tap, and Kinesis Project dance theatre present Capacity, or: the Work of Crackling September 24-25, 2022
- ASM Presents Radical Acceptance album release celebration July 21, 2022
- ASM Presents Heart Songs and Sounds June 29, 2022
- ASM Presents VEER QUARTET at Greenwich House Music School June 25, 2022
- ASM Presents Infrequent Seams Streamfest 3 June 16-19, 2022
- ASM Presents ASM waters the garden May 15, 2022
- ASM and PinkNoise present: lo spazio inverso April 15, 2022
- ASM Drinks Alone For Two And A Half Years And Have No Plans To Stop Now April 1, 2022
- ASM presents Kilter At Nublu March 31, 2022
- ASM presents Home Audio's 10th Anniversary October 2, 2021
- ASM presents The Ultimate Love June 30, 2021
- ASM presents ONLY YOU WILL REGONIZE THE SIGNAL, Episode 5 - This Mesh We're In December 3, 2020
POSTPONED: Accordion show June 5, 2020POSTPONED: Saxophone show May 22, 2020- ASM Drinks Alone, Alone Again, Again February 23, 2020
- ASM + Opera On Tap present This Is The Ground July 5-6 / July 12-13, 2019
- ASM Presents Beeferman's Organ Trio June 14, 2019
- ASM Back In Back June 22, 2019
- ASM Drinks Alone Again (Squared) May 14, 2019
- ASM Presents Sandcatchers April 24, 2019
- Yiddish Labor Songs and More! January 18, 2019
- ASM + New Camerata Opera present Kamala Sankaram and Rob Handel's ENCHANTRESS November 30, 2018
- ASM riffs (Hangs out in barres, again) June 30, 2018
- PREMIERES: ASM Plays What You Ain't Never Heard Yet June 28, 2018
- PREMIERES: ASM Hangs out in barres June 21, 2018
- Looking At You February 8-9, 2018
- ASM Drinks Alone / Pours One Out December 17, 2017
- PREMIERES: PEOPSSONGS & CHEWY FOOT June 8, 2017
- The Wind in the Bellows (A is for Accordion, encore) May 19, 2017
- PREMIERES: A is for Accordion March 24, 2017
- ASM Drinks Alone Yet Again (Again) March 6, 2017
- PREMIERES: ASM Drinks Alone Yet Again February 10, 2017
- BABEL fragments release party August 25, 2016
- Horse Morsel in the Park June 21, 2016
- PREMIERES: ASM, The Oxford Comma, and The Interrobang May 28, 2016
- PREMIERES: ASM Drinks Alone Again. Again? Again (aka ASM vs Andie Springer) March 11, 2016
- Hands Hands Hands Hands (encore performance) March 4, 2016
- PREMIERES: ASM Has Too Many Hands January 29, 2016
- Much more Muchmore at Muchmore's November 4, 2015
- PREMIERES: Venimus, vidimus, audivimus vocem June 21, 2015
- ASM drinks alone in a Soho loft June 18, 2015
- ASM Under Waters June 10, 2015
- ASM Drinks Alone again... again May 8, 2015
- New York's Alright If You Like Saxophones (encore performance) March 31, 2015
- PREMIERES: ASM Does Not Get Saxy February 20, 2015
- WIP Free-for-all BBQ potluck! June 29, 2014
- MMNY 2014 @ RVRSDE PK @ 116th June 21, 2014
- PREMIERES: ASM Plays On Words. And Strings. June 13, 2014
- ASMin' like a BOS (Bushwick Open Studios) May 31, 2014
- ASM G̈oes̈ D̈euẗs̈c̈ḧ May 16, 2014
- PREMIERES: Big Pieces For Small Groups
January 17February 23, 2014 - Glue Gun Optimism + ASM December 15, 2013
- ASM Walks The Dog June 19, 2013
- PREMIERES: ASM Drinks Alone... again May 9, 2013
- PREMIERES: A S M: A Ca Pe La April 26, 2013
- PREMIERES: SHOWDOWN @ JACK! February 18, 2013
- Anti-Social Music Distracts You on a Stressful Night November 6, 2012
- PREMIERES: Diana's Opening Night October 20, 2012
- Anti-Social Music Takes it to 11! March 9, 2012
- PREMIERES: New Music from Ukraine February 7, 2012
- Cloud Bridge, Detroit - with Warren Defever (His Name Is Alive) October 14-16, 2011
- Look Out, Sarah Lawrence September 28, 2011
- Nono Muchmore Warp(ed) Festival September 17, 2011
- ASM Resurrected (10th Anniversary!) April 29, 2011
- Triangle - A Puppet Play with Live Music! March 24-26, 2011
- PREMIERES: Slumming in the Slope March 4, 2011
- ASM Back at Union Pool! December 8, 2010
- ASM Tours to Ukraine! October 30 - November 7, 2010
- ASM Gets On a Plane! October 23, 2010
- New Music Bake Sale September 25, 2010
- Elvis Tribute To End All Elvis Tributes August 16, 2010
- PREMIERES: ASM Dips Skinny! Union Pool Party June 30, 2010
- Mucho Mas Muchomas! May 27, 2010
- Papacookie Potluck May 14, 2010
- Democracy! March 25, 2010
- PREMIERES: Little ASM, come blow your trumpet January 14, 2010
- ASM Gives Kamala Money November 24, 2009
- ASM Goes (for) Broke! June 25, 2009
- Lonewolf Tribe Benefit May 2, 2009
- New Music Smackdown! April 2, 2009
- Anti-Social Music... Drinks Alone March 6, 2009
- The Glorified Rehearsal! February 17, 2009
- PREMIERES: Election Night Spectacular! November 4, 2008
- ASM Blows! September 28, 2008
- PREMIERES: Whistling Pigs! June 19, 2008
- Playing Some Music March 13, 2008
- COME TO THE FRONT! February 24, 25, 27, 2008
- Muchmore Music — Muchmore Pierogies December 13, 2007
- PREMIERES: Feeling Conservative? November 10, 2007
- OOTASM!!! September 30, 2007
- Mohair Time Warp Redux June 27, 2007
- PREMIERES: I HATE SEA BASS: On Willful Obscurantism in William Brittelle's Mohair Time Warp June 8, 2007
- Anti-Social Music Gets Toasted, Visits Bucolic Wonderland May 12, 2007
- änti-söcial müsic dons heavy-metal umlauts April 22, 2007
- ASM: STUCK ON CAPS LOCK April 4, 2007
- Get Your Resolutions on with ASM! January 13, 2007
- PREMIERES: The Climax of the Octopus December 2, 2006
- ASM's Gone Soft November 10, 2006
- Give US a Chance October 22, 2006
- Come Out the Wilderness! September 19-21, 2006
- Nitration! June 25 / July 1 & 2, 2006
- ASM at Sarah Lawrence and The Rat Land March 29 / April 4, 2006
- ASM Hits the Medium Time February 23, 2006
- ASM Purls Two January 19, 2006
- ASM Does NOT Sing the Great American Songbook December 10, 2005
- ASM Gives Feedback in Philly November 12, 2005
- His Name is ASM! September 17, 2005
- ASM Titters Coyly September 8-10, 2005
- PREMIERES: Spooning with ASM May 21, 2005
- AWOL for ASM February 8 & 18, 2005
- PREMIERES: ASM Sleeps Around! December 10, 2004
- PREMIERES: ASM Splits the Difference October 8, 2004
- ASM Family Reunion in DC August 28, 2004
- Joe Maneri's Unknown Chamber Works August 14, 2004
- Gin and Tonic? Try ASM and Tonic! July 11, 2004
- PREMIERES: The Deadly Rhythms! May 9, 2004
- Insert funny here... April 18, 2004
- PREMIERES: ASM saves Tokyo! March 13, 2004
- Late-notice Jersey January 4, 2004
- ASM vs Guignol November 24, 2003
- Hallowmas! October 31, 2003
- ASM on the road, again October 17-19, 2003
- PREMIERES: ASM Sings and Plays Out of Tune October 11, 2003
- Return to Galapagos! June 7, 2003
- PREMIERES: New Music...With Moxie! February 22, 2003
- Look Ma! Indie opera! January 23-25, 2003
- Don't you just hate that obnoxious little Darwin? October 19, 2002
- What's that Lassie? August 24, 2002
- Very Bad Gothic Poetry August 3, 2002
- ASM stole my girlfriend July 4, 2002
- PREMIERES: Try not to break the fine china June 21, 2002
- Bored at work tomorrow? June 20, 2002
- Oasis Grab Bag May 11, 2002
- PREMIERES: Dig it -- We're Incorporated! December 1, 2001
- An Afternoon of Anti-Social Chamber Music! March 25, 2001